The process of ending a marriage is challenging. Not only are you dealing with the legal matters, you’re also having to handle the social, emotional and logistical aspects. While there are many things that can make it more difficult to go through the process, having to deal with an ex who’s narcissistic is one that can make things much worse.
If you’re dealing with this situation, you have to think ahead so that you can determine how you’re going to react to various tactics the narcissist will use to try to control the situation.
The truth isn’t required from the narcissist
Your ex is going to only use the truth about things when it serves them. In a narcissist’s world, the truth is totally optional. Instead, they will try to twist things so that it appears they are the victim in the situation even when they caused many of the problems.
It is usually best to hang on to as much evidence as possible when you’re divorcing a narcissistic person. This includes anything tangible that you can show the court when your ex tries to bring up negative things about you.
Divorce is a game to a narcissist
Everything is a game to a person who’s narcissistic, and they always want to win. They aren’t going to care about how their actions impact anyone other than themselves. This makes it challenging to deal with them in this situation.
Because they won’t negotiate, you’re likely going to be pushed into a trial. They will see this as a positive thing because it enables them to drag the divorce on even longer. Additionally, they are going to realize that you’re spending more money than you would have if there was a settlement.
Protect yourself
You have to protect yourself when you divorce a narcissist. They are going to try to manipulate the situation and make you as miserable as they can with the hope that you will just give up and give them everything they want. Instead of falling into this hole, make sure that you think carefully about each decision you make. Try to fight the battles that are truly important to you and leave the others behind.
Your divorce team is going to be a primary source of protection. They can act as a barrier between you and your narcissistic ex’s tactics if you let them handle most of the interaction. Be sure that you take the time to evaluate each option you have thoroughly so you can do what’s in your best interests.